Let's Learn about: Super Sentai!

So something I've always found strange is the fact that generally although almost all of you have at least in one form or another seen something Super Sentai related, you've not been aware of it. Well, I'm looking to change that. Edumacation, motherfucker. I'm gonna learn you some shit. Completely asinine shit, but what the fuck are you coming here for expecting an actual useful lesson for? Come on.

It's interesting but the first bit of 'Super Sentai' most from America and other countries get to see is actually not the first but the sixteenth in a long-running Japanese Tokusatsu series. Tokusatsu is Japanese live-action film or drama that typically deals with super heroes. Basically these guys are the Batmen and Supermen of Japan. The first bit of 'Super Sentai' you've seen? I already know what it is, you probably don't because you probably don't know that it's 'Super Sentai' ( And notice I keep using quotation. It's not actually Super Sentai, it's an altered form of it's original form suited for Western audiences. )

Anyway the first you've likely seen is this and you'll recognize it instantly as 'Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers', fact of the matter that's not what it is.. What it originally is was a series that ran in Japan from 1992 to 1993 known as 'Kyoryu Sentai Zyuranger' ( Dinosaur Squadron Beast-Ranger ) and it's interesting to note that almost always ( If not actually always ) the Super Sentai original is vastly different and typically ( Subjectively and in my opinion ) superior to it's Westernized counter-part. Interestingly enough? What you'd of seen and did see from 'Power Rangers' is and I stress again VASTLY different from what you'd of seen from Zyuranger. Whereas Power Rangers had a bit of a goofy and cartooney edge to it and was clearly marketed towards a younger crowd, Super Sentai tends to target a larger audience ranging from children to adults. And sometimes that can be a little disturbing from a non-Japanese perspective because some of the shit in the shows you'd never associate with a show that was even remotely intended for children to be watching it at all. Violence? Got that in deuces, way different than Power Rangers because in a Super Sentai it is not at all uncommon for someone to be delivered such a devastating blow to the jaw that they spew blood all over a nearby flower like a ripe cherry tomato being fucking popped. Drama? You bet'cha! Super Sentai works hard at skull-fucking their characters! There have been many a character whom were simply dealt such a bad deck in life that you're left going 'goddamn no wonder they're buttfuck crazy'. Death? Hells yes we have death. Ever wondered why the 'Green Ranger' had to be done away with so soon in Power Rangers? That's because they ran out of original footage to use ( By the way, 'Power Rangers' uses footage cut from the original Super Sentai. Much of a show of Power Rangers you'd see is actually Super Sentai footage dubbed over. ) because the Dragon Ranger, Burai fucking died. He was killed by the main villain, Bandora. Another fun fact? Bandora was featured in the Power Rangers too, she was portrayed by actress Machiko Soga whom passed away in 2006. Yes, she was 'Rita Repulsa' in the Power Rangers.. Sadly, she is no longer with us..

In the Power Rangers, Machiko was of course dubbed over and her character was fairly seriously changed from the wicked Bandora the evil witch and trust me, she was evil. She killed one of the Rangers, you won't see that shit every day. Getting to the point, Zyuranger would continue and without going into a full history and run-down of every Super Sentai and Power Rangers there's ever been I'll say this. While Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers ran for three seasons, Zyuranger was only from 1992 to 1993, from 1993 to 1994 the Super Sentai became a new Super Sentai known as 'Gosei Sentai Dairanger' ( Five-Star Taskforce Dairanger ) and out of the Dairanger there is only one you would notice although you would notice the mecha as the 'Zords' from Power Rangers Season 2. The Dairanger were never used because they were too violent and culturally unfriendly to Westernization. Whereas previous Power Rangers had only used varied mixed Martial Arts the Dairanger used forms of my chosen style in real life ( That I regularly practice ), Chinese Kung Fu.

The Ranger you will notice of course is the Kiba Ranger or 'White Ranger', Kiba Ranger interestingly enough having been a child. His was the only suit and footage used in the Westernized version of the show, the series 2 Power Rangers.

Then there were of course the Dairanger mecha which I'm sure you'll also notice. They also had a fucking giant robot turtle of goddamn doom that was actually some fatass dork that was actually not a fatass dork but the giant robotturtletakenhumanformandhewasreleasedbyacrystalwhichmadehimturnbacktemporarilyintoagiantrobotturtleand WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING!? Breathe, damn it! Breaaathe! Okay, so they're Japanese. Shit gets weird, really weird. Dairanger? Shit gets hand-puppets with hand-guns weird where the damn puppets are trying to take the Dairanger out by shooting them. Fuckers.. You can't kill the heroes off with such mundane methods, you gotta blow 'em up, dumbasses!

Point is with this history lesson, there were Super Sentai before-hand. Before 1992 and 1993 and before Zyuranger and 'Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers' in the U.S, first Super Sentai ever? Himutsu Sentai Goranger.

PS: POWER JAMMIES ARE GO MOTHERFUCKAAAA! Yes, the costumes are cotton. This was before spandex and trust me these weren't the worst of them.

I'm not even going to bother elaborating. I'm just going to point out; helmet wig.



That brings us from the first Super Sentai literally thirty five years later. That's right, this motherfucking series? Has been running for THIRTY GODDAMN FIVE years. The current? Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger ( Pirate Squadron Gokaiger ), we've been through thirty-five years of Japanese insanity with this shit. Some has been great, some has been horrible and some has simply been bearable. The current incarnation is leaning towards great. You know why? Bad and good, there are thirty fuck five years worth of Super Sentai crammed into one goddamn show.

CHEESEANDCRACKERS CHRISTFUCK that's an overload of Super Sentai.

Sufficed to say as we continue to follow this current series, we wait with whetted anticipation for what is next. You want my opinion? Power Rangers pales big time in comparison to Super Sentai as can be expected for something designed to be more puerile and marketed towards a younger crowd. Want to experience epic? Try 'Gosei Sentai Dairanger' ( And prepare to feel as if you're on a fucking acid trip of awesome ), or perhaps one of the best if not the best Jyuken Sentai Gekiranger or even the current Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger. With thirty-five years worth of Super Sentai at your feet? You certainly won't be bored for long if you choose to delve into this series.

AND I HOPE THAT WAS FUCKING INFORMATIVE.