Fun trip to Walmart last night, it yielded at least two items to blog about. Admittedly not my usual haul but fuck off, I did my best and I've got at least one review which is unheard of because this will be the fourth goddamn time which is insane for me because I'm actually being constructive. BULLSHIT!
First item of note worthiness ( 'note worthiness', see what I did? *snort* PUT THE GUN DOWN, DAMN IT! ) is a note-book. Not just any note-book, it caught my eye because of it's awesome retro design. Don't care who thinks what about this thing but this thing is awesome, with the polka dots on one side and the other side graced by awesome stripes
This note-book is so fucking swinging 60's, it's epic! Why would you want anything other than this? Why would you choose another note-book over this one? I had the choice of kittens and I chose this above that. Only thing I could ask for? A Neapolitan dress and bag to go along with my Neapolitan notebook, maybe fashion isn't your thing but you can't tell me that wouldn't be awesome. I might look like a dork ass-hole but I'd be a cool dork ass-hole.
Short article, huh? It's going by pretty fast for me at least. What can I say? Some nights are bigger yield than others, some are just.. Well.. Like tonight.. Not bad but not huge, but at least we're getting to where we wanted to be and the moment you've all been waiting for; the promised review!
Wrigley's React 5 Swerve Tropical Gum: MOTHERFUCK THAT'S A LONG NAME. FUCK YOU WRIGLEY'S, YOU AND YOUR DAMNED KIDNAPPED LABOUR-SLAVE ORANGE-SKINS!
...I digress.. The actual product here is of course as mentioned React 5 Swerve Tropical Gum, the name "Swerve" is surprisingly warranted, this stuff? It's brand-new, brand-new in the sense that it was sitting on a rack in an unopened package marked with a note that specifically stated that these were not to be put out for sale yet.. Haha.. Yeah.. Fuck you Walmart, I'm going to give a shit that your gum isn't supposed to be on sale yet when I see a new one. Am I? Hells no, I'm not. I swiped a box of this bitch along with the apple-pie gum I've already reviewed and James and I got one between us again and traded a stack of each so we could have ten gums each, five of which were Swerve and five of which were Apple-Pie ( SAGAAAAAAAAAAAAN! ) back to the name, though. The reason it's warranted in name is because the flavour is insane, by insane I mean it will kick your godddamn teeth out the first few chews. It's incredibly strong when you first bite into it, it tastes exactly like an orange/tropical smoothie and it's absolutely delicious, the flavour surprisingly actually lasting, it lasts for a long time and especially so if you do the gross thing that I do by pausing your chewing every now and then.. Somehow the gum regains some of it's flavour if you give it some time to rest between chewings.. I know, I'm gross. Would I suggest this? Hells yes. This is freaking abso-fucking-lutely delicious. I imagine in the future if we can find more carts there will be more gum in the future to be reviewed, I saw a few on the cart which I was tempted to get and maybe next time I'll be willing to take a chance for them and for you lot. Maybe, know what would help? COMMENT YOU BASTARDS! COMMENT!!!!! GIMME SOME DAMN LOVEEEE!
(EDIT: Seem to have posted an incomplete draft by accident, problem is remedied now. Hopefully no one noticed my flub. Move along, nothing to see here. *jostles you with E-11.*)