Remarkable Retro Rations 9 & Skewered Steak

It really peeves me off that so many of the best favourites from earlier years past have been discontinued. It seems like a company will take a winning product and choose to completely disregard it in spite of the vast levels of utter insanity this seems to suggest on their part; it's a corporate foot-bullet it seems.. In spite of this there are a plethora of awesome amazing products out there that throughout the years have been done away with before their time and as a testament to the insanity of these companies and their complete lack of logic even things like the Willy Wonka Candy Companies flag ship Wonka Bar has been discontinued. How can you discontinue the item your entire company is based off of!? - But they did..

Perhaps somewhere hidden in the madness that seemingly exists without rhyme or reason there is some sort of coherent thought process and reasoning, who knows.. I know I don't see it myself, I don't see it at all.. All I see is the companies holding that gun right to their foot and proceeding to pull the trigger as fast and frantically as they possibly can. I can't understand it, seems wholly self-destructive to me.

Flintstones Push-Ups with Nerds:

I'm definitely not a fan of Nerds as I've said in the past, in the past I have preferred the chewy variations that Wonka has infuriatingly always discontinued - I dislike Nerds because they're tiny, hard, and barely feel like a snack or candy worth while but in this case coupled with my love of Push-Ups which were awesome and nothing but they work and become a very acceptable addition that in spite of my hatred of them alone easily makes the snack several times better by their inclusion.

Of course Flintstones Push-Ups were always simple enough on their own and they were also epic fucking little snacks that everyone I can think of that had them loved - Simple creamy and delicious sherbert Ice-Cream that sat upon a plunger with a stick attached, you removed the little paper wrapping from the top, pushed the plunger up, and enjoyed and these were one of those snacks that didn't lose anything no matter what in fact they could begin to melt and it somehow only made them better in spite of the gooey stickiness that got all over your hands.

The inclusion of Nerds into the mix only added to it as the little candies seemed to absorb the cold of the Sherbert and created a nice candy crunch to the otherwise completely smooth and creamy Ice-Cream making this both refreshing and substantially more enjoyable.. The little Nerds in this would crunch up as you ate it and you'd end up with Nerd remnants stuck in your teeth that while normally I'd have hated somehow were better and enjoyable providing me with a source of flavour for hours and hours to come after the Push-Up was finished.

Push-Ups were the best, the best says I - Fuck your Pudding Pops, Pudding Pops had nothing on Push-Ups.

I still love the fact that Fred and Barney are fuckin' Gangsta.

Ralstons S'mores Pudding Bars:

This is one of those items like Pudding Roll Ups that no one remembers and no one knows about but I doooo - In the 1980s and shortly into the early 90s Ralston sold these things - S'mores Pudding Bars, basically S'mores meets pudding meets candy bar, oh these were indulgent, purely so. These were awesome and delicious as well. Totally worth the damage they did to you with the way they tried to deceptively hide their unhealthiness by toting the fact that they were 'Granola Bars' - Yes, even in the late 80s and early 90s anything claiming to have 'granola' was considered 'healthy' or at least typically made the claim to being.

As I said these were simple, simple and goddamn delicious; holy shitting Pope on a unicycle were these ever good - It's interesting that someone could actually produce a pudding that tasted like S'mores, it was interesting and epic. But it wasn't just the pudding, the bars were slightly more complex than that, Graham Granola that had tiny bits of marshmallow embedded in it with a nice semi-solid pudding coating that was just.. Wow.. Yes.. And no, these weren't better frozen.. When you got these you sought to warm them in the oven for a very short period of time and then when you ate them? Prepare to be cock-slapped by the delicious schlong of the Amazing Snack God Snackignanimus.

Yummy was not the word - Yummy doesn't begin to describe their deliciousness but like I said they were purely indulgent, there was everything to be bad in them and nothing to taste bad. What a perplexing combination.

Wonka Super Skrunch Bar:

This one makes me sad to remember, it makes me sad to remember because it's quite possibly in spite of not being White Chocolate, not being Dark Chocolate, but just being an average Chocolate Bar with ingredients you can find in other Chocolate Bars today was quite possibly the best Chocolate Bar that has ever been conceived or created - There have been imitators but never has a bar been the same as the Wonka's Super Skrunch Bar.

These were around during the 1970s and if you were really lucky into the late 1980s and possibly the 1990s as expired food-stuffs, two decades is not enough to make these inedible, there's not much that could convince me that eating one of these was not worth the risk in spite of it's potentially ancient nature.

The Super Skrunch Bar was simple enough, simple enough and yet since it was discontinued there's never been another Chocolate Bar quite like it, it took awesome and toned it to eleven. The Bar here was a simple concoction of Rice Krispie Cereal, Peanut Butter, and Chocolate - It was delicious and nothing like anything that is around today, the fact of the matter? Not many Chocolate Bars today are even the same or even close texturally to this Bar, the Skrunch Bar had a fuckery of textures that congealed into one mass of utter win; creamy, crunchy, crispy, peanut buttery, and chocolaty all in one bar, gods was it ever good. Gods was it ever unique.

These were almost like a mixture of several Chocolate Bars in one; Kit-Kats, Butterfinger, and Reeses Peanut Butter Cups all in one Chocolate Bar - You can not imagine texturally the difference between what these were and what is on the market now if you've never had one and if you've never had one, I pity you. Everyone should have at least one Skrunch Bar.

Bring these bitches back you.. You... DOUBLE BITCHES!!!!

PS - Alternatively one of the other better candies of the Wonka line were Oompas which ran from the 1970s to 80s as well and were discontinued seemingly with the Skrunch Bar - Oompa's were like giant M&M's but were half Chocolate and half Peanut Butter filled, they were like the decadent delightful ball-sacks of Oompa Loompa's; Oompa bust a nut in you, a peanut..

A Chocolate Creme on one side and a Peanut Butter Creme on the other made these hard candy-shelled delights truly delicious and allowed them to be even softer than Reese's Pieces making them quite amazing.

Seriously, why discontinue these? Worse yet they came out with another version of Oompas that were fruit-flavoured and no where near as good as these - Why?


Dinner:

Mm yeaah boooy! This is Butaniku no kushiyaki (Simply 'pork skewers') and is a meal as simple as it's name suggests but oh so amazing.

Two skewers of pork steak and a herb spiced steamed rice make the main dish of this meal with the two skewers sporting a custom-made teriyaki glaze which just shimmers so beautifully I could see this dish winning prizes off presentation alone.

And the two sides are a simple Peanut Butter Double Chocolate Chip Anpan (Sweet Roll) and a baked potato.

Sufficed to say I'm very happy how this came out, it was made in an attempt to tweak my recipes to be more cost and ingredient effective and considering how little/how cheaply this meal was made I am very pleased with myself. Who knew you could take such basic things and turn them into something so amazing? Rock on, huh!?

Meee-Ow, bitches.