Crazy Crunch 3 (What could be and could have been) & Egg Me On!

As with other brands in the past, Cap'n Crunch leads me to question the eternal question; exactly how many different variations does a single brand need? At what point does the endless re-branding and re-purposing of a product become too much? Is it when people seem to begin to expect an alcoholic version of a product that is otherwise not associated with alcohol in any way, shape or form?

There's been a milk shake already, why the fuck not a Cap'n Crunch alcohol? Make the alcohol out of the Crunch Berries, then it'd be 'pure grain', right?

OHGODNOTTHEFACE!

How about a hardcore goddamn axe for which to rip most mightily?

Fuck yeah, jammin' with the Cap'n!

At any rate, sufficed to say the products offered in the line of Cap'n Crunch are many and varied (There's not an actual alcohol unfortunately) but the products we're really going to be touching upon are not wicked axes or powerful proofs but rather edibles from the strange to super!

Dragon Crunch Oatmeal:

A weirder product from 1991 which was ultimately never released, Dragon Crunch was Cap'n Crunch except Oatmeal style.. Yes, that's right.. Cap'n Crunch Oatmeal as strange as that sounds which came in multiple varieties including Strawberry, Apple Cinnamon, Tropical Fruit and Variety Pack which is kind of fucking redundant since Strawberry, Apple Cinnamon and Tropical Fruit are varied to begin with but what the fuck ever. That just meant you got ALL of the flavours in one box.. Or you would have if they'd ever released it.

I dunno, Cap'n Crunch Oatmeal would presumably be very crunchy for Oatmeal (I'd hope at least) and would sport some sweetness oatmeal otherwise did not have? If so, that sounds really good to me.. It's kind of a throw back to other oatmeal of the past that were so friggin' awesome but ultimately done away with.. Under Cover Bears Oatmeal or Cookie Blast Oatmeal being two that come straight to mind..

Carnival Berries:

I love any cereal that changes your milk colours, coloured milk is just naturally more fun than just plain ass white milk.

Introduced in 2004, Cap'n Crunch Carnival Berries didn't just change your milk the standard fare colours it changed your milk goddamn pink and all sorts of abnormal fucking colours. How many cereals can you think of that changed your milk a colour like pink/purple? Probably not many.. That's because it's a weird ass colour for cereal and milk.

Of course naturally the cereal didn't taste any different from the normal Cap'n Crunch Crunch Berries but did that stop me from loving it? HELLS NO. PINK FUCKING MILK, BITCH!

Why did they stop making this? Make more! OR at least another Crunch that turns shit pink! Pink, it's what's for breakfast, punk!

Are You Afraid of the Dark? Crunch:

This is pure marketing. I've posted in the past about my love for Are You Afraid of the Dark?, as far as I'm concerned it was a great show of it's time and I miss it dearly. In 1996 Cap'n Crunch marketing at least in Canada saw fit to release this little gem, an Are You Afraid of the Dark Cap'n Crunch.. Or at least a box..

You know it's kind of sad really, I love it for it's marketing and I didn't hesitate to buy these at all because of the label on them which was the intention by Quaker but they had so much more potential to work with... Why no Crunch Berry Spiders, Snakes and Witches? Shit like that which would have gone so well with the theme of Are You Afraid of the Dark? and would have made such an awesome cereal? There could have been SO MUCH MORE done.

Alas this was the standard fare cereal inside what was simply an awesome box.

Dinner:

Gyo Omu (Fish Omelet) is what was for dinner tonight. It's a very nice dish that I created with a big salted and peppered Omelet wrapping the delicious innards of pan-fried White Fillet and Mushroom all folded together with a cheese-soy sauce that finished it off. The Anpan (Sweet Roll) was a Cinnamon Sugar Anpan and set together with the main dish so nicely.

Yeah, it came out pretty great!