Wacky Weirdness 2

The coolest shit we see and wackiest shit we see is often older shit from years gone by. Why is it that our bygone era's seem to smack of such sensational insanity? Well.. To be honest it probably has to do with the fact that during certain periods of time just a slightly higher volume of drugs were being regularly consumed but.. Y'know..

I digress.. Any product that does in fact make me feel like I've been tripping on acid is a winner in my book.

Space Dust:

Originally patented by General Foods research chemist William A. Mitchell in 1956, Space Dust was a candy whose existence is owed to.. Well, like I said.. A chemist.. So someone actually sat around figuring out how to chemically concoct candy, is that.. I don't know.. Weird sounding to anyone else? It's like I have images of mad scientists bent over a chemical set night after night obsessing over the creation of the PERFECT POPPING PLEASURE!

...The first two weren't that successful because, well..

...Yeaaah..

It came out in the 70s and owes it's wackiness to the fact that it's a 'sizzling' (popping) candy and the fact that.. Well.. Look at the faces on those packages. If that's not an illustration done by an individual tripping on illicit substances I don't know what is and I've seen a lot of illustrations done by individuals tripping on illicit substances.

...Yeah, don't ask.. I don't want to discuss how or why..

Just watch the commercial and tell me that this doesn't come off as the worst most nightmare fuel induced trip evaaaaar.

Tang:

This shit is SPAACE FOODS! - We all know why it's wacky, any astronaut edibles are automatically wacky because no sane person would want to eat/drink this shit.. And surprisingly in spite of being a drink you can actually eat it if you so desire..

Another originally formulated by the General Foods Corporation food scientist William A. Mitchell in 1957, Tang was never particularly popular until actually being used during Project Mercury by John Glenn in 1962. The reason given? And I quote;

"There was a particular component of the Gemini life support-system module which produced H₂O (water) among other things. This was a byproduct of a recurring chemical reaction of one of the mechanical devices on the life-support module. The astronauts would use this water to drink during their space flight. The problem was, the astronauts did not like the taste of the water because of some of the byproducts produced, which were not harmful of course. So, they added Tang to make the water taste better."

You added Tang to make the water taste better?

...Must of been some seriously shitty water..

FOR A BAG 'O ROCKS!


Space Food Sticks:

Because the prevailing theme seems to be space, Space Food Sticks! Developed in the 1960s by Pillsbury's chief food technologist, Howard Bauman, Space Food Sticks were quote unquote;

"A non-frozen balance energy snack in rod form containing nutritionally balanced amounts of carbohydrate, fat and protein"

Sounds fucking DELICIOUS! HUH?!

...Yeah not so much but that's why it's wacky, who the fuck could turn down a non-frozen balance energy snack in rod form containing nutritionally balanced carbohydrates, fat and protein!? I mean my mouth is watering just thinking about it! Step back, goddamn!

Strangely enough these are a predecessor of energy bars and came in a variety of flavours including Peanut Butter, Caramel and Chocolate - The only place these are still regularly sold is Australia.. FANCY THAT.. And only in Caramel and Chocolate..

Just.. Yeeeh..

Because we all know astronauts have a tiny EATING HOLE in their HELMETS because that wouldn't TOTALLY FUCKING KILL THEM OR ANYTHING.

...Nutritious my ass.. Trying to get the astronauts to explosively decompress.. Dicks..

Dinner:
No dinner post tonight I'm afraid, I kind of screwed it up and honestly while I'm not upset I'm also not proud.. No reason to post it then. I'll make up for it another night. They can't all be winners after all.


BONUS:

Purchasing an alternative gum, Orbit Bubblemint I was treated to one of the most prettiful (BITE ME I CAN USE WORDS THAT AREN'T WORDS SOMETIMES!) packs I've ever seen with like.. This cherry-blossom style design I guess it's meant to be? What cherry-blossoms and 'bubblemint' has to do with each other I'll never know but whatever. That's fine.

Pretty pack is still super pretty.