Sensational Snacks 15

Is it weird that I think this is more win than fail when it's actually definitively fail? I have to wonder if whoever made this sign wasn't some dipshit moron like myself that did this totally on purpose because it seemed like a good idea at the time? I mean come on, take a look at it.. It's a sign reading "Pop-Tards" sitting right on top of boxes that read boldly and clearly "Pop-Tarts", you're not going to tell me this was an accident. Bullshit says I.

It's always snack foods I notice too that fall prey to either these fails or these awesome wins depending on who you are and how you consider it, that's probably because snack foods are cool and just work out to lend themselves to shit like this and because people who are attracted to snack foods are usually morons again like myself who just can't resist the dipshit actions that will probably later get us in trouble but seemed like a good idea at the time. Fuck it if we offend someone, if you're not offending someone then you're not trying hard enough.

You know on a completely different topic I wish we had Japanese snacks more available outside of Japan because the Japanese come up with some crazy and flat out funny shit that's often unintentionally funny and often unfairly unique and delicious. I mean come on, when a common Japanese snack biscuit is called.. Well..

...Yeah, you've managed to hit on some unintentional hilarity here.. Especially since they're biscuits with holes stuffed full of filling.. Just..Yeah..

Luckily for the world at large (not for me because I never got a box and I'm sad because of it) the Japanese do market some things globally, specifically things like Sanrio products, Sanrio of course being the company responsible for Kitty White and the Hello Kitty line which is what our first product is from.

Hello Kitty Loops:

Yes, I know.. They're basically Frosted Pink Cheerio's but I don't give a damn, they're 'Hello Kitty Loops' and actually they're not 'Frosted Pink Cheerio's', they just look like them. As I understand they actually are said to taste rather more like Fruit Loops than Frosted Cheerio's which I'll state is definitely not a negative in my book.

These were introduced in 2009 and well, they're so awesome I can't stand it and I want a box but bleh.. I'll never have one and that sucks! They're pink which is even more awesome and I'm kind of left to wonder and question, if eaten with milk.. Dare I hope or dream that the pink little Kittyfied Loops would turn your milk pink? Because if so, another selling point has just emerged.. For me at least.. Being as how fucking simple and puerile I am.

Y'know it's a proven fact that fans of Hello Kitty are far more sane, responsible and productive members of society than normal and average folks.

...Actually that's a bold faced fucking lie but still..

Hello Kitty Loops! Pink fucking cereal! It's a goddamn awesome thing and it's weird that I like it because I'm weird. Seriously just think about it and consider it, I'm female, I'm a Martial Artist in real life that loves kicking her own ass training every single day in some way and at the same time? I fucking love girly girl shit.

CONTRADICTIONS! Ha-Ha!



Pillsbury Figurines:

Back in the late 1970s and 1980s Pillsbury introduced a Diet Bar product called 'Figurines', Figurines were meant to be low-calorie replacement alternatives for meals and were only 138 Calories a Bar which today isn't that impressive considering most 'Diet Bars' are either 100 or under 100 but back in the day these were pretty impressive and many people will tell you stories of how in the 70s and 80s they lost weight thanks in part or entirely to these.

Interestingly enough as is contrary to what seems to be the rule in spite of being Diet Bars these didn't taste like shite, they were actually quite delicious.

Delightfully sweet icing like coating covered the bars (They were available in many flavours such as Vanilla, Chocolate, Chocolate Mint, Caramel etc) and had a crunchy kind of wafer-like biscuit interior that made the majority of the bar, they were absolutely addicting and insanely delicious.

It's also a point to note that the Vanilla, Strawberry and Chocolate went excellently with a dipping-source such as Milk or Hot Cocoa. There was and never has been since anything quite like a Vanilla Figurine Bar dipped in Hot Cocoa or a Chocolate or Strawberry dipped in Milk. It's like you took the basic idea of dipping an Oreo in Milk and tuned it up to fucking twenty.

♫ ♪Figurines were sweeeeet reveeeenge♫ ♪

Man these were good, good enough to be a valid replacement for sweets and to be chosen by actual choice rather than necessity to things like Candy and Candy Bars and I miss them like crazy. There were so many goddamn flavours, even a Cheddar, believe that? ...Well you should, it's true! 

Fucking Pillsbury discontinued these for some dumb ass reason, I can't believe it was because of lack-luster sales, these things were fucking amazing and I can't understand why they haven't been brought back yet.

Dinner:

Shoga to Kabocha no Howaitofisshu (Ginger and Pumpkin Whitefish) is the dinner for tonight for James and came out b-eau-ti-fully! 

 

Oven baked White Fish Fillet topped by a Ginger Pumpkin Japanese Tartar Sweet Sauce on a bed of Carrots and Steamed Rice with a delicious Blueberry Anpan (Sweetroll) - Very nice on this if I do say so myself, it's been an abnormally good day so far. Eerily so.