Walgreens White Wonder

You know I love White Chocolate, I've said it in the past and I'll say it before and defend it from any of the troves and hordes of those who would damn and condemn it for simply existing. You say Milk Chocolate is the best, Chocolate Chocolate or Dark Chocolate and I say bullshit. You may make the argument that White Chocolate isn't actually Chocolate technically, I'd say technically I could bitch slap you because I felt threatened by that comment and was doing so in self defense because I believe that no rationally minded, sane and safe person would say such a thing. White Chocolate is simply awesome.

Point in fact, White Chocolate is actually made the same way Dark Chocolate and Milk Chocolate is made so your argument that 'White Chocolate isn't technically Chocolate' is actually technically wrong. In direct spite of popular belief, White Chocolate is Chocolate. Point in fact White Chocolate also must be at least 20% Cocoa Butter, 14% total Milk Solids, and 3.5% Milk Fat, and no more than 55% Sugar or other Sweeteners.

'Course there are varying types of White Chocolate, some that people would call White Chocolate aren't actually White Chocolate, they're cheaper imitations and honestly I still love those cheaper imitations. Many for instance and example would call Hershey's Cookies 'n' Creme Bars 'White Chocolate' when in fact they are not and have in fact been forced to stop calling themselves that because they don't actually contain White Chocolate, they're a cheap imitation;

Establishing that the reason being is that Hershey's replaced the high-cost Cocoa Butter for Oil Substitutes which makes the bar no longer White Chocolate but rather an imitation as mentioned. An imitation which isn't by any stretch as good but isn't really 'bad' per say, it's just not as good.. Definitely though it is indisputably worse for you than actual White Chocolate as is typically the rule where Oil is substituted for anything. Oil is evil in food.

Actual White Chocolate however isn't that bad for you really if you consider it a snacking item and don't eat it constantly of course and eat portioned amounts.. As is the case with most things it's more about how much of something you consume, you show some control and consume only a small amount and you're fine, act weak-willed and scarf down a whole thing and yeah.. You'll end up a lard-ass pretty quickly..

Anyway.. Where was I? Oh right.. White Chocolate is awesome..

And that's why I was so ecstatic to hear when James came home one night and informed me that he'd printed labels out for a product that they were going to be getting soon. The very first genuine White Chocolate Bar that our local Walgreen's or any Walgreen's really around these parts had or would sell.. Not just any White Chocolate Bar, no.. We're not talking run of the mill average shit here we're talking pure uncut goddamn White Gold.. Not a drug but it might as well be, a Lindt motherfucking White Chocolate Bar.

For those that aren't aware, Lindt is known corporately as "Lindt & Sprüngli AG", they're a luxury Swiss Chocolate and confectionery company that was founded in 1845 and in spite of having some of the most highly priced Chocolate products I've ever seen, the shit I was never able to afford 'back in the day' or hell any day really they're also well known for having some of the most high quality Chocolate products known.. Basically this is one of the rare examples where you're not exactly paying for a brand name, you're genuinely paying for quality.

One fun fact about Lindt is that they have eight of what they call 'Chocolate Cafe's' in Australia, four in Sydney and four in Melbourne. Basically a Chocolate Cafe is a place of Heaven where they offer everything from Cakes, Ice Cream to Drinks all having to deal with Chocolate. Master Chocolatiers of course are on staff creating the fine Chocolate Cuisine you'd enjoy in a place like this.. If I ever got to go to one of these I think I'd have to bring a few changes of pants and panties because, well.. 'Nuff said..

Aaand that's how we get to this. The review of this actual product which is Walgreen's first Lindt White Chocolate Bar, not just any White Chocolate Bar either, this White Chocolate bar specifically features an ooey gooey and melty White Chocolate center at the heart of each individual piece and yes, this Bar is made up of individual pieces.

You'll have to excuse me but this was one of the rare times I wasn't able to exhibit enough self-control to take photographs before trying the product so it was nice, pretty and complete.. I pretty much shredded the goddamn packaging with my claws, tore apart a few pieces of the Chocolate Bar and almost went Augustus Gloop on this bitch.. I'm lucky I didn't because as I mentioned earlier, laaaaard ass.

Let me describe this to you.. I put the piece in my mouth and almost started chewing before James urged me not to, I let the piece sit and a choir of Heaven spawn Angels appeared in my mouth, singing hymns of holiness and goodness... Aaand then I unceremoniously destroyed them all with the unholy and Satanic abomination that was my tongue, smashing them like the helpless goons they were against the roof of my mouth and proceeding to wet my pants in wicked wonderment as the surges of pleasure wracked my body.

Oh. Holy. Shit.

These are amazing, the White Chocolate is unlike anything I've ever tasted before White Chocolate wise and that's saying a lot, it's creamy and oh so gooey right away when it hits your tongue, that extra bit of White Chocolate creme on the inside makes for an orgasmic spurt when it touches your tongue and.. Oh shit.. I mean oh shit, you've just GOT  to try this for yourself.

The Lindt White Chocolate Bar gets 10/10 Big Cat Paws EASILY making it the first product I've ever reviewed to get 10/10, this fully deserves it.

I shudder to think what this thing will do to my waist-line... Then I pop a piece and I really stop giving a shit.

Dinner:

Yay and I officially made up for the shitty presentation of dinner for James last night, Dinner for James tonight? Orenji Niwatori Itame (Orange Chicken Stir-fry) and is a delicious mix of Chicken and Mushrooms cooked in a delicious Orange Sesame Soy Sauce (home-made) with a side of Steamed Rice and a wonderful Double Sweetened Anpan (Sweet Roll)

James scarfed this voraciously and not only that but complimented me rather heavily on it so I know it was seriously good. Very happy with it.