Now I'm not going to claim I've never eaten Fast Food before, I have and I'll even admit that from time to time something on their menu's often tickles my fancy and I'm tempted to try that something, I don't typically.. In fact I think the last time I had Fast Food was actually over two years ago so there's that, yeah.. I stay away from the stuff pretty religiously unless you count the 3+ year old Hash Rounds I keep in my kitchen for experiment purposes.. The 3+ year old Hash Rounds which still exist, pulsing with strange and unholy unlife, it's true.. I'll even admit in fact that Fast Food Chain Hardee's recently introduced an awesome dessert item I'd like to try, something called the 'Brrrger', it's an Ice Cream abomination that.. Well.. Look;
I can't tell if it'd be good or disgusting.. It's not healthy for you, that much is clear. It's two biscuits (U.S. 'Cookies') sandwiching Chocolate Ice Cream with Frosting that replicates the appearance of condiments, though I'm confused as to what condiment is lime green in colour and slimy.. I guess it's supposed to approximate the colour of pickles? Eh.. I don't see that but it's fun looking all the same.. Though one of these motherfuckers is 340 Calories with 150 Fat Calories, that's bad, you know what's worse though?
Unsurprisingly something worse comes from Fast Food Chain Sonic Drive-Thru, a burger monstrosity introduced by them going by the name of The Sonic Ring Leader Loaded Burger Double Patty, with a name that long you know right off the bat that it's going to be an unhealthy and evil thing and yes, it is. Oh how very much it is.
The photograph looks quite pretty, doesn't it? Of course the media photograph portrays the burger as something delicious and tempting looking, that much is to be expected.. Is the actual thing? No.. Not aesthetically and not calorie wise either..
The actual burger here is rather.. Soggy looking.. And yeck, I mean.. Look at that, it's flat out nasty looking with droopy Lettuce, rotten looking Cheese, and the Beef Patties? They look almost.. Slicked.. By like oil or something, the things appearance alone churns my stomach, let alone the 'Nutritional' Facts for it, there's nothing nutritional about this aberration which sports 1,660 Calories in a single burger, 120 g of Fat, 44 g of which are Saturated Fat, and 4 g of which are Trans Fat, and 1,450 mg of Sodium? SHIT, that's absolutely terrible.
And the last item? I've got no Nutritional Information on this offering, all I know is it's from Hungry Jack's (U.S. "Burger King") and it's something that.. Well.. It's an Ice Cream offering that just flat out scares the shit out of me.
Really? A Bacon Sundae? I know we've already done Bacon Milkshakes but what exactly the fuck is the obsession that's formed recently with people and Bacon? Bacon does not belong in goddamned Ice Cream period, I don't care what you try to rationalize it to 'go well with', Bacon doesn't go with Ice Cream, damn it!
Why if they're so set on doing something 'unique' can't they do something better and more appealing than a Bacon Sundae? Why not a Peanut Butter Banana Jelly "Elvis" Sundae or something else, anything else really.. Of course this is assuming you can find a Fast Food joint that actually has a working Ice Cream machine, in my experience the few times I've actually tried to get Ice Cream from either Mackers or Hungry Jack's their machine has inexplicably and inevitably been on the fritz.